Ugh.

Nope, haven't fallen off the face of the planet...just trying to juggle school, Reid, pumping, attempts to nap/sleep (for all of us!), grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning...I could go on and on. I have a billion things I need to be doing right now, but I just need to vent! Writing on the blog is therapeudic at times. I'm not sure how many times I've cried in the past week. It could be anything--leaving Reid, lack of sleep (he quit sleeping through the night as soon as I went back to work, and now he never naps at the sitter's either), being bone tired, first week of school blues (you forget how you'd "trained" the previous group of kindergarteners until a new crop comes in!!)...you get the point. So no pictures on this post...I haven't had time to take any :(

The week started off fast and furious. Our school schedule begins nearly an hour before last year's schedule...which would be fine, but now I'm getting Reid AND me ready for school/sitter in the mornings. I now have to get up by 5:30, but Reid's been waking up so much that I'm basically up at 4:30 or 5 anyway. It's been virtually impossible to get the pumping/feeding/changing/packing all done plus take care of myself. Thank the Lord for my wonderful mom, who was here Sunday evening through Thursday morning last week to help. I seriously don't know what I'd have done w/o her. Jason has been wonderful, too. He isn't here much during the day since he works so far away now, but he's done absolutely everything he can, and brought me beautiful flowers on Monday, too. I'm soooo sick of all those people out there who say/think, "Oh, kindergarten--how fun! You just get to play with them all day!" No, folks, lemme clear it up for you... By the end of the year, they can sit still more than 2 minutes, I can somehow juggle the questions, testing, and drama of all 20 kids all day long, they must be reading on a level 6 book and adding/subtracting...I could go on and on, but the losers that actually think teaching kindergarten is easy won't bother reading this anyway. Let's just put it this way: I worked from 7am until 6pm just about every day this week, was there most of last Sunday, and still bring things home to do. I don't get 10 minutes to myself during the day (unless I'm pumping, which is not fun anyhow), I didn't get a lunch break, and my planning period is spent madly writing notes home to every single child's parent. I know it will get better...it has to. But I didn't think it'd be quite this bad. God wants me here, so I am here.

After the crazy week, all we wanted to do was relax. I found out I'm not making nearly enough milk all of a sudden (stress can do that, I hear), thus one of the reasons Reid wakes up a ton at night again. So we decided to begin supplementing with a little formula at night to see if it helps him sleep. No big deal, right? WRONG. We tried a meager two ounces on Friday evening around 7pm. He was still hungry, so I let him have some milk, too. (I hear lots of people mix milk and formula at the beginning to get babies used to the new flavor anyway) We went about our normal evening routine--bath, book, bed. He was really tired after not napping, so went right down. I went in to pick him up for his dream feed at 10pm, and noticed something wet. Then he proceeded to projectile vomit all over me, the crib, the bassinet, and himself. Lovely. I burst into tears b/c I didn't know if it was a virus I brought home from school (I did have a puker this week), the formula, or what. Plus I was dead tired myself and had a ton to clean up. Then there's the old "feed him, or don't feed him" since he puked. I opted for the don't. And sure enough, he puked four more times. The after hours nurse finally called us back and seemed to think it was probably the formula, but recommended a visit to the peds office in the morning (love that our pediatrician has sick child hours on Saturday!). Reid finally slept (in his clean bassinet placed in the middle of our bed b/c I was too scared he'd puke some more and choke and we wouldn't know), we cleaned everything up, and finally drifted off to sleep ourselves. Saturday, the doctor basically said it could be anything...viral, adjustment to the formula, stress, just an upset tummy, blah blah blah. So basically, our guess was as good as his, but at least we got a clean bill of health on our little guy and found out that he weighs 12lbs, 4oz. So I haven't been starving him too much even though my milk has majorly dwindled this week due to stress (so basically, I pump twice as long, but get half as much, causing even more stress b/c I'm now not making enough for him to eat). The doctor laughed a bit as he suggested to get more rest (ha!), try not to stress (haha!), and drink plently of water (yep, already doing that and eating healthily even though I'm never hungry). I can also take fenegreek, some kind of herb that is supposed to help with milk production. We got some immediately, so hopefully that will help. He also suggested waiting until today and trying just one ounce of formula to see if Reid tolerates it. So he got one ounce at 11:30 and we're waiting anxiously to see... The poor little guy has been really gassy today, so really fussy (and he, Jason and I just seriously need peace after this past week!!) so napping has been a joke. I'm keeping my fingers crossed right now b/c I just put him down (again!!) oh, and there he goes crying again. Got up for the third time just this paragraph...

Sorry to be a Debbie Downer this week--please keep us all in your prayers! We really needed a restful weekend after last week, but it's turned out to be anything but that. Above all, despite all this, we are so fortunate to have little Reid and are thankful he's a growing little guy. He's certainly not been an easy baby (does that mean he's likely to be a good kid--just getting it all out now? lol) but we love him dearly and are thankful for every single day. Jason and I both have jobs so we can provide for him, and we're thankful for that as well. Now if we can just find a little sanity in our lives... Guess all we can do for now is pray things get easier, and we certainly know things could be much, much, much worse. Sleep deprivation just blows it all out of proportion ;)